I Need To Hustle

"If you can't pass by the name, then get out of my face."

I want a shirt of Does It Offend You, Yeah? Plus I need to see them live, as well as my other favorite Indie, Alternative, Rock, Experimental, or Techno Bands.



Anyways, the novel that I'm reading seems boring as hell. I did some research on it, and it is claimed to be a well written book with complex characters. But if I have about three days to read and write a report on it, then all of those book review praises are alien to me.
It's Friday tomorrow and I'm supposed to go to a party. But that doesn't really matter anymore, because I have plenty of things on my mind.
5 days until Bully's birthday...

I need to hustle.

Something...

made me rethink my decisions today. I kept telling myself not to be a quitter over and over again, but sometimes I feel like not giving a fuck anymore. I have hella work to do, and it's just piling up on me. When I woke up today, I said I was done. School is like going into a black and white image of an office with fucking robots that have the same routine every single day. The weather is definitely not changing anything. Everybody is starting to get sick.

I'm really glad I got persuaded today. I need to step my game up.


And as a note, if you have no rational opinions, then you might as well claim yourself to be a source of your own conflict.

"Shoot that nigga doh!"

I pretty much had a 3 day weekend, and it was a "my-head-is-spinning" type of weekend. I swear I wanted to faint from having to deal with bitchass motherfuckers haha.
Saturday I went to pick up Bully (his new nickname from me) at downtown vallejo bus station. Went to Krystal's house to chill. Played Grand Theft Auto which was pretty badass because we were all actually paying attention to the game. Do not get me started with video games because I will start getting down on some serious business haha. We watched Mark and Kay wrestle and chase each other around the house, and before we knew it, the house was filled with about 30 people just for our little kick it night. It was already getting loud. They were playing beer pong and king's cup in the garage and the kitchen. Ha, those people were hilarious. And I was hella tipsy tho, I'm not gonna lie hahaha. But I'm not an alcoholic haha. I should post a few pictures later on, it was pretty crazy. Carlos was hella high, he started boxing by himself and doing one clap push-ups right in front of us while we were trying to play video games in the second living room (the game room) haha. So more people came, and Ryan told me about the story when he and his friends got kicked out of 5 clubs just before going to our house. They had their I.D's tho, but their other friend was causing shit. Haha. Well I wrestled Bully and we were boxing for a few minutes. Nigga thinks he can whoop my ass but he ain't got shit hahaha I'm just kidding. Well I was sleepy at around 1 in the morning, so I probably knocked out at around 4.

Sunday was lazy day since it was raining. We chilled again and played some more GTA and then watched The Happening. Waited til they got back then headed to downtown vallejo. Shucks, I'm gonna miss Bully! And hopefully he doesn't really run people over with stolen cars and shoot random niggas on the sidewalks haha.

School needs to get exciting. Fuck Vallejo. SF all the way

The Fear

"Life's about film stars and less about mothers
It's all about fast cars and passing each other
But it doesn't matter cause I'm packing plastic
And that's what makes my life so fucking fantastic"


Lily Allen is a 23 year old British singer and song writer that has been compared to the new hit Katy Perry and jazz singer Zooey Deschanel from head to toe. I don't blame them, these singers are like clones. But I personally think that their music is distinctly different. Out of the three, I favor Zooey's voice the most. Yet for Allen, I'm glad I have learned to get used to her songs for being well known for the sarcasm in portraying mockery and the unstoppable hypocricy in the social world.







Well, maybe I should inform you.

She's a little bit of a badass.

Two Words (Part 1)

I wasn't planning on going to school today. I woke up with my head throbbing, and my whole back felt like it had been against ice all night long. I turned the alarm off from my phone, and decided to continue sleeping.

Then I remembered there was a test today, and it would be best to organize and catch up with some work. I told myself that if I didn't get up, I would not live up to my words in setting my priorities straight. Lately I had been missing school for those little stress here and there from either work or illness. But today I stood on my grounds, and let's just hope that it won't be the last.

When I got home, my dad asked me if i went to school. I had been struck by something once again. I thought to myself, "Damn, I really would have answered 'No' since I came so close to staying home today." I felt guilty because I had known this for a long time, that I would have just let it pass and say "Oh yeah, dad, I felt really sick this morning." But he knew that I did, and that is what brought me to the two words he said that have been hunting me all night.

DISCIPLINE and DEDICATION.
It reminded me of my drumline year, which unexpectedly turned my hate and fear into tests of patience and determination. I could have sworn I wanted to give up atleast twice during that whole year, but I didn't. When a member fell, the whole group fell. When one excelled, the rest strived for perfection. Those Indian runs, military push ups, and silent drills were like sadistic echoes in our heads that made even the quietest ones to curse under their breath. The whole story of my drumline year would have to have a separate blog, maybe the readers would further understand all the things we learned. But until then, this whole point is to remind everyone, including myself, to consider recentering your aim, and straightening your priorities. Today I made a tiny step closer,

and so should you.

I just want to throw this in: Thank you to the readers.

today wasnt any different than the previous ones. i struggled to get to school on time since i already missed school the following day, but i eventually failed to do so because of my movement that seemed like 3 inches per minute.

ms. hill's class only had about 15 students since there was a ski trip today. i should have gone since wednesdays are too boring, but i'll let that pass.. i already went to lake tahoe just a couple of weeks ago. i dont feel the need to rattle on about my other classes, they really start to irritate me more and more. well.. thanks to mathis for being such a goof (and for the "graphite" haha)

i need excitement, i need to have something to look forward to in school.
i still feel a little sick, so please drop the shitload and swallow your fucking pride.

And that is all I can ever need.

an incomplete blog of my four day weekend. photos taken from my phone.

i was hella dizzy. hahaha

one of my all time favorite radio station<33

i dont really feel like getting into detail, but my weekend was pretty interesting.

i felt hella sick on monday tho. i woke up wanting to throw up all day.

well today i felt like i had been struck by something, like a pound to the head. for some reason i felt like there's a lot of nonsense going on and there's really no need for that. if something happens to you, LEARN and move the fuck on. there is no need to hate on anybody because you never know who will really be there when you fall. and oddly enough, they may be the ones you would have never expected. i mean, how many of your friends will be able to stick by you for a lifetime? if it happens, great. if it doesnt, it's expected.

so basically i've been thinking about the drama and bullshit going on. it's life, but damn, straighten your priorities and get rid of all that shit load you have.

i'll take this as an advice even for myself. i need to set my priorities straight and just live, laugh, and learn. i know it wont be easy because of all the inevitable immaturity, but atleast i have a new mind set. and that is all i can ever need.

Don't get yourself burnt.

YOU'RE ONLY PLAYING WITH FIRE.

Blame It

i woke up hella tired today. mark already came to the living room where i had fallen asleep from watching Troy at about 1 in the morning. while he was gone to get some furnitures, we watched The Exorcism of Emily Rose. dang she was hella creepy. haha. but i only paid attention to the second half of it.

when mark and jenna returned, we continued watching the rest of Troy. gahdamn you should watch that movie, if you havent already done so.
"soldiers die for kings they havent even met, and people who dont even know them. they obey; they die when they are told to die."
a few interesting concepts.

well what happens when you hella miss someone and theres a bar in the house?
TIPSY. haha no chaser. dang you should listen to Blame It by Jamie Foxx ft. T-Pain. hella funny memories.. and hopefully theres more to come.

My Valentines Day

My alarm went off at precisely 8:30 in the morning today. With my eyes red, I managed to turn and hit the off button, then finding myself only grabbing the sheets to go back to sleep. After a few minutes of shrugging and yawning, I remembered why I had set the alarm in the first place.

It was Valentines Day.


After my daily routine, I sat on my bed to think of all possible ways of starting the day's plan.
Little did I know that those possible ways didn't mean just ways; they were plans of plans, and statements over statements that eventually led me into having no plans at all.

I had a lot in mind, actually. I could have sworn I succeeded and failed at the same time. Whenever something went right, another went wrong. And when something subsided, another came up.
The bottom line is, I do not find the need to praise this occasion for the time being. I suppose I'm going to relive this and have a whole new day that I would actually consider to be Valentine's. If it wasn't for Anton's optimism, I would have left those cute little painted cards on the cold hardfood floor, and went straight to bed at precisely 8:30 in the evening.





Happy Valentines Day My Prince Charming.
Love,
Your Baby Girl

Friday the Thirteenth

fuckingshitbitch! this is an outrage

Heartless

Today is Friday the 13th and by far, this has been the weirdest valentine celebration I have ever had. I didn't expect anything from anyone, really. And then he, whose name I will not mention, gave me something special.

Of course, my heartless self had to tell him no right to his face.
Some people just really give a lot of effort, and some people just really don't accept them no matter how many times they try. I mean, I can't force myself, right?

All I know is, I'm really thankful for him and the things he has done for me. But other than that, there is nothing more I can say.



Am I heartless?

NEW BLOG

Hopefully I really get to keep this, and stick with it.
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